Thursday, December 08, 2005

The bane of Christmas

It's after exams, you want to relax and walk the streets with friends you haven't had the time for during semester. Let's not even talk about walking the streets. Even in your neighbourhood Starbucks, Coffee Bean, Video Ezy, restaurants, they are playing Christmas songs.

Just a week into my rediscovery of the streets of Singapore after being holed up in campus for 15 weeks, I have already become sick of Christmas songs. No, it's not that I don't like Christmas songs. They bring back very pleasant memories for me. Ever since secondary school, I'd been carolling every year with the choir until a year ago, when I stopped going back to join the TJ choir. Last year, I carolled with the people from USP at TTSH and this year I'm going to do it again. There's nothing like the feeling of making music together with people you love, and though I do not observe this holiday, doesn't mean I don't get to revel in the commercialised, plastic cheer of it all like everybody else.

But even this cheery bunny has her gripes. And she has taken the time to make a list of songs that should be nationally de-recognised as good songs to play in a shopping mall.

Ten Christmas songs that should be banned, either on grounds of annoyance level or effects on blood pressure:

1. Do they know it's Christmas time (has to be number one. Goodness knows why all department stores play it for hours on end. You know, it goes "Feeeed ther woooooorld, Do they know it's christmas time" with a LOT of bell jingle-jangling. *puke)

2. Jingle Bells

3. Santa Baby (This song should be made illegal. Not only is it annoying, it provides this visual of a slutty lap dancer crooning it in her transsexual voice. "Hurry down the CHIMNEY baybeh oooooh")

4. Little Drummer Boy (Parampapampum and repeat and repeat and lather, rinse, repeat)

5. All I Want For Christmas is My Two Front Teeth

6. Auld Lang Syne

7. Do You Hear What I Hear? (Psycho stalker song I say)

8. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (I DON'T BLOODY CARE!)

9. Rudolf the Red-nosed Reindeer

10. Winter Wonderland

What they should play more of:

1. More Sinatra and Darrin, Ella Fitzgerald and Nat King Cole

2. Christmas Waltz

3. I'll Be Home for Christmas

4. Joy to the World

5. Gloria

6. Please Come Home for Christmas by the Eagles

7. What Child is This?

8. Good King Wenceslas

9. Oh Come All Ye Faithful

10. More Boney M (YES I KNOW!!!! Who still listens to them?! This bunny likes!)

Funny thing, while searching for Christmas song lyrics, I found this from for Ashanti's Christmas Time Again, the chorus allegedly goes:

"Its christmas time again, can't wait to hear all the slay bells ringing."

Wah rao how funny.


Anonymous said...

Boney M.....ooooh i like.
Mary's Boy Child is such a happy sooong! -lio

Anonymous said...

I actually went to their performance with my parents. =)